How the mind works

I wouldn't have thought the subconscious mind could bring memories to the forefront so vividly just because another page turned on the calendar. Today is 3 years since we first realized something was wrong with Ed. Last weekend I was in Iowa for a 4-day visit, checking in on and helping out Melissa, mainly. She is having a rough time with nausea during this pregnancy. (If you haven't heard by now, Melissa and Mark are expecting August 29.) Three years ago, Ed and I made the trip to Iowa to help paint the newly finished basement, the very family room that becomes my bedroom when I'm there. I looked at those painted walls last weekend, but it didn't trigger the emotions and tears that seeing today's date on the calendar has triggered. I described what happened to make us notice a problem with Ed's gait when I wrote in the blog on March 6, 2008, so I won't repeat it all here. I just didn't expect it to all come back and hit me so hard again.

I do have some pleasant events to report on since I last wrote on Christmas Eve. The Giesman gathering here on January 1 was a success. The gifts of digital photo frames that I loaded with memorable photos tailored to each recipient were a huge hit and caused much laughter among the young adult grandkids as they saw photos of their parents at their age. Almost everybody was here. Sherry and Jeremy had already visited me Christmas Day. A couple older grandkids didn't make it, nor did David and family who were vacationing in Florida, but everyone else seemed to enjoy being together. I went to Iowa January 7-12 and Christmas there was January 9. Will had so many Christmas celebrations spread out over 2 1/2 weeks' time that he must have thought Santa visits every few days whether you've been good or not.

I wasn't assigned to the late January-early February SAT essays, which disappointed me. However, I will be working on them in March. Since I had some time with no commitments, I went to Stuart, Florida (actually the community of Sewall's Point on the Indian River and intercoastal waterway) for 4 days at the invitation of my cousin Judi and her husband Frank. The weather never got warmer than the mid 60s; nevertheless, the sunshine felt good. Judi and I hadn't had time together since we were teenagers, so we had a lot of catching up to do. Between their beautiful home, the sun, the sounds of the ocean, long walks in the area and on the beach, and Judi's delicious cooking and baking, I felt like I was at a resort enjoying some much-appreciated relaxation. I didn't give all the snow and ice back in Columbus a thought, even though I had to snowblow my way out of my driveway to get to the airport to start the trip.

I got back from Florida late on a Friday night, and on Saturday morning I received an e-mail alert about an airfare deal to Cedar Rapids. So five days later I was on a flight again. Turned out the weather in Iowa was better than what Columbus was having. Now, finally, we have some warmer days and sunshine that will get rid of the mounds of snow. It has been a particularly snowy winter, and I've used the snowblower a lot to keep my driveway and sidewalks clear along with those of three neighbors.

I'm still dealing with my eyes, although at my last checkup two weeks ago, finally the ophthalmologist said things look much better. He had to search for inflamed cells; a normal exam might even have missed them. I'm still on steroid drops once a day and artificial tears every three hours or so. I regained some of the distance vision I had lost, something I noticed in about the last month. My close-up vision is unbelievably good. Mid-range distance is sometimes good and sometimes a little blurred, further proof that it can take 6 to 12 months until your vision finally settles down and your brain has fully learned to accommodate the Crystalens implants.

Next weekend I'll be driving over to Virginia to see my mother and sister and family. I haven't been there in quite a while. Then I'll be going back to Iowa for Easter.

Tomorrow, my Hearts group is having a farewell party for Mary, who is moving back to Wisconsin to be near her daughter and two sisters. She is the first of the Hearts to move away. Her stepchildren don't want her to go. (She has lived here 30 years and is very close to her stepchildren; they have been so good to her in the past 2 years since her husband died.) However, Mary says she feels a pull to go back to Wisconsin. I haven't had that experience, feeling pulled to move somewhere. The other good news from the group is that Pat and Pam, who've been part of the Hearts from the beginning and started dating almost 2 years ago, are getting married in May. I have a hard time wrapping my brain around the idea of marrying again, but I'm happy for the two of them, of course.